I missed the snow, Paris.

When i got in this morning, it was 1 degree Celsius.
Boy it sure feels like -2 though.

Daddy always tells me it's colder n coldest whenever the snow is receding..
Not when it's likely or going to or is snowing.
He calls it 退雪。

Not expecting to come to Paris at this time of the year, or ever for a long long time..
I was pleasantly surprised.
Yet.... with the whole quitting thing looming... not too excited either.

I came down with a killer sore throat.
A consequence of greed as i wolfed down ferrero rochers one after another, while having coffee, tea, Coke. but not enough water.

I slept thru lunch n tea but remembered that the French do late dinners.
So at 9pm I finally woke with renewed strength n walked out to the chains just outside Porte Maillot in search for food.

The warm goat's cheese salad at Leon's was good!
So was the pot of Adreienne style mussels which had slivers of bacon n button mushroom slices in it too.
And the 25cl. lil' jug of sauvignon i had.

Looking outta the window while eating alone at a French restaurant n jus thinking n chewing, i thought about what did the years of service in this company meant to me.....

a random old man walked past while I was licking the ketchup off my fingers n smiled at me thru the window


And i half smiled at him back with something in my mouth like the above pic.

I wondered come 2010 how often will i have time off alone to collect my thoughts like then.
How often will i get to wander strange streets on my own n b awed by the sight of people, buildings, things I'm not used to seeing.
How often will i have time to do the things im so used to doing when in hotel rooms alone outstation.
How often i run thru my head reminding myself to reply to the waitress in the foreign language, whatever little i've come to learn when she comes over to check how m i doing.
Random things....
You know??


Actually, u'll never know.


Being on your own outstation versus being on holiday with other people is such complete difference.
The senses r different. the responses n thoughts that go thru the head are different.
And that is the only thing i love bout my job.
The time i have to myself when im overseas.
And i truly enjoy being alone to enhance these senses too! without the mindless chatter of bimbos n ppl i dunno.

There is so much to love bout it.
But yet so little to give up when i do.
Tis is when i compare it to the many other things that will make me happy when i'm always at home.
I just hope that i've not made a wrong decision. or overlooked some things cos i've had too much of another.

I'm actually scared!!!! bleahg* ;b