"Love, like rain, can nourish from above, drenching couples with a soaking joy.
But sometimes, under the angry heat of life,
Love dries on the surface and must nourish from below,
Tending to its roots,
Keeping itself alive."
- The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom
I devoured this book in one sitting(actually only bout 4-5 hours), on this Saturday night when i'm at home.
When I picked up the book again after a shower, boyfriend came by with surprise dinner tapao jus when I was settling for yoghurt n potato crisps for a late dinner.
That was nice...... :)
Actions like these, n those of little initiatives, like holding my hand n telling me everything is gonna be fine whilst in an argument....
are to me like love in the rain.
It falls over us n reaches the grounds, n gets stored beneath the earth's surface for use again when too much heat n sun takes a toil on us.
It can then be tapped from the roots of our love again, for days when the love no longer falls like rain.
How much is in our love reservoir?
How deep underground do our roots of love stretch?
I stress again and always on the foundations of a relationship.
Communication, understanding..... lotsa talkin talkin talking....
To me... when a couple gets each other, it's everything. Ain't it?
.................................................
Nearing 3/4 of the book, parents started hollering at each other in the bedroom
Well, more like my dad hollering n my mom speaking in hushed tones.
Sounded to me like 1 wanting very very much to communicate n talk n be heard n be understood. While the other simply was too lazy to do so.
N they do this all the time!?
N I feel the pain of both, u know?
The one who wishes to be heard n understood becomes more desperate n despaired when the other refuses to see things his/her way.
It becomes a lonely battle with one's own mind.
How else do u get outta yr head what u wanna say, jus to one particular person, most of the time the closest to u?
The one who is simply too tired, blanked out from work, can't handle neediness, can't express self person will simply become horribly frustrated at the other person who keeps pushing his/her tots onto ownself.
He/she feels like the other is trying to force something outta them. n therefore, more frustrations.
Leading to anger.
SIGH.
It sounded n feels like my arguments with bf.
Well. i dunno.
There r bad days n there r good days.
I'm jus glad to be home tonight to witness my parents' fight.
At least i know wat goes on beneath the surface, though im still wondering whether it was okie for me to intervene the way i did.
It affirmed the fact that i need to sit down with my mommy for a good heart to heart talk one day...
Well i think i shld make it soon.
N it also kinda added more stress for me being the eldest in the family n being jobless n kinda in between everything in life now.
Argh.
Esp when hearing daddy lamenting while in tt argument jus now bout how tired he is of working working working n how he feels like jus shirking responsibility n walking out.
I cant blame him really.... bearing the burden of a family of 4+1 on his aching, tired n sore knees is really bad.
(+1 cos of grandpa. n Grandpa is simply driving mom up the wall with his stupid elderly tantrums n quirks. n mom in turn drives dad up the wall cos she needs an outlet. i just wish it was Grandma instead of Grandpa though. Cos she's so much more of a delight to have around. Fuck. should i even be allowed to say this?!?!? Geez)
I have sore knees too, n i know exactly how bad it feels every single second.
I need a sign, a direction. Someone to tell me wat to do quick so i can relieve my sore kneed father before he can no longer walk.
Time to look into my reservoir of strength, which gets bigger n deeper as more Love Rain falls.
I draw strength from my rship. I know it's a big risk to take.
But tt's me, when im happy in love, nothing else matters.