Someone Like You...

I think my closest friends all know what I do when i go thru a bad time.

I either...

Drink until im outta control.

Smoke til im outta control.

Blog emo-ly til all readers get turned off.

Vent my anger on public billboards like Facebook.

Read Shakespeare like obsessively trying to pose as a cheem' emo.

Tweet heavily. To the point of annoying cos i have a tendency to fill out yr entire page w my shit.

Maybe my bestie was right to have a bad feeling.

Cos this time i actually started a Twitter acct for my puppy.

Follow him @Baby_J_den for a dog's view on his life with his owner, ie, me.

I know right?

I'm definitely going crazy this time.

Perhaps even kinda schizo??

Well.. the point of this post really...

is this:

I got to thinking bout break ups n all tt jazz.

u know those quiet moments u have to yrself n u think where did it all start to go wrong, wonder y din things work out..

Thinking about all the good times n bad.

N how time flies from yr courtship period to the down in the dumps period.

N then i asked myself.

Why oh why. if at the very beginning I had doubts bout a dude, i couldn't ever stop myself from falling headlong into another possible disaster even when i kinda knew it would b a-coming one fine day?

I thumped out my heart for an hour n 15 mins on a private blog to him, closing all but 2 months of our draggy end...

But could never find the right words to tell him all tt face to face.

He was like my soulmate when the communication medium was virtual, thru a blog of all things.

When speaking over a phone would definitely result in a shouting screaming match, 

N when skin to skin, my head just stop reasoning, my heart jus stop beating the normal way n my foul mouth jus entirely clams up??

I had told myself maybe it was only the beginning stages of new love, tts y my heart skips all the time ard him.

Then only now i realise...

It's because initial attraction pulled the wool over my eyes.

We have extremely different point of views, values, morals, all of which r such important things.

When they say opposites attract, i think they mean stuff like character, personalities, hobbies...

But when fundamental things built into a person from since he/she was brought up in, now tt's a different story. Ain't it.?

I  did love him. Hell i did.

This 2 year relationship is the second longest to tt of the mega ex.

I will always love him too.

But the clashing n fighting as a result kinda killed us, me, him.....

Maybe, Well, i'm just wondering...

The Right One ain't someone we r attracted to in the first place. 

N then try so hard to make it work.

I think The Right One is someone unassuming. Someone whom we prob dislike at first instance...but discover tt we could really TALK to. communicate properly with. Feel with heart n soul what the other is thinking... as if by telepathy?

The Right One could just b tt soulmate everyone has to have.

But this one... well..could b just The One Who Got Away...

U know. 

Like , well, The One Who Got Away (TOWGA for short), is always the one where the rship was dramatic, full of love, n sacrifices... but was never enough to make it to Happily Ever After.

Each rship/persons shld have their individual TOWGA for different indiv reasons also la.

 

I had sworn before, on my life, never to share a dogwith a bf ever again.

N look wat i did!?!

My pup has gotten so emotionally dejected after losing a supposed Daddy tt he has freakin' gone n set up a twit acct for himself.

(K Im losing it. defintiely schizo liao) ;p

So now another question.

In a lifetime, how many TOWGAs can one have?

.

.

.

Duh. 

Of cos ONE la.

it might change as experiences stack up. new relationships come along. 

like playing musical chairs.

But yes, i have come to a conclusion in my foggy sleepy crazy feverish mind now tt everybody has a The Right One n a TOWGA in his/her lifetime.

Be honoured to b someone's TOWGA though. 

Cos they will always look back fondly n think of how their life would b better/spicier/happier with u than the one they end up with......

U will b the fork in their life path. 

A decision made tt left one possibility unexplored. For watever reasons...

Notice though, tt when one chooses someone else other than their TOWGA, the chosen one might not b The Right One (TRO)either.

So u could b left with wondering if yr TRO could still b out there waiting to b discovered by u. On top of wondering if yr TOWGA regards u the same way u regard them as well..

 Basically, it means tt even if u settled down. n u r someone like me who thinks too much. or watched too much SATC, u'll never b happy.....

KNN Now tt's wat i call serious mind fucking. 

Fuvk me Fuvk my Life Max~.  >;O

(yo bestie, u understand this shit or not?! wahahah)